Solstice Reflections

writing full time, surviving saturn's return, and the year's best reads

Welcome to the end of the year, gentle reader! Shake the snow from your hair and slip off your shoes by the door, then settle down on the plush couch in front of the crackling fire. Have a doze, have a brandy, have a moment of contented quiet. You’ve earned it.

Emerging From The Revision Tower

If you’ve been keeping up with my adventures on Instagram, you know that I completed two developmental revisions, back to back, over three months, smack dab in the middle of the holidays. Was this an ideal timeline? No. Was it the direct result of me luxuriating with my time a little bit too much earlier in the year? Naturally. Am I euphorically punk-drunk on my achievements and ready to spend the next ten days napping and baking and living my best no-thoughts stay at home leisure princess life? Oh yes.

I delivered ASCENSION to my Angry Robot editor on December 2nd, and I delivered SAVAGE BLOOMS to my Orbit editor at 5pm London time on December 23rd—okay, 5:30pm London time, I had to make that cliffhanger nice and nasty for ya.

SAVAGE BLOOMS is for the real freaks, the real lovers, the gothic tragedy enjoyers, the readers who have been pleading with me to write a book that “feels like A DOWRY OF BLOOD” (in the lush prose and emotional anguish sense, not in the vampire historical sense). If you like your romances scorching, agonized, twisted, and drenched in myth and magic, SAVAGE BLOOMS is for you.

Psst, my beloved UK readers, Waterstones has a preorder link up super early, so you guys have advance access to secure your copy.

Thank You, Daddy Saturn

If you’re on the internet, you’ve probably heard about the phenomenon of a Saturn return. This astrological transit marks the moment the plant Saturn, ruler of boundaries, duty, control, and restriction, moves back into the place it was when you were born. Folks hit their Saturn return in their late twenties and emerge from it in their early thirties. You will notice that it’s a time when many people get married or get divorced, make huge career moves, move cities, or are forced to address childhood wounds. The transit last a few rocky years, and it will transform you, if it doesn’t kill you first.

This was the second year of my Saturn return, and it was a huge year in personal growth for me. Without getting into too many intimate details, I spent a lot of the year furiously journaling, crying in therapy, crying in spiritual direction, or just plain crying. I was faced with so many parts of myself that I feared, or that I hated, or that were just plain dysfunctional and yet, tasked with driving the car of my life! On the outside, this looked like separating from my 9-5 job in finance, doing deep work to nurture my closest relationships, prioritizing my mental and physical health above all else, and betting on myself and going full time as an author.

I’m not out of the woods yet, but I have finally started to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I’ve purged enough metaphysical poison from my system that now, I feel good more days than not, and like myself more days than not, and I experience deeper joy and confidence and meaning than I ever thought possible.

However, that does not mean that getting kicked in the ribs by Saturn until I ponied up and learned some hard lessons didn’t hurt like a bitch. I’ve learned a hundred lessons this year, but the most important one is this: it’s good to get comfortable being uncomfortable, and its in those moments of deep discomfort—even helplessness— that we experience the purest love from our friends and partners, the sharpest clarity about our priorities, and sometimes, even the still, small voice of God. And my weird, kinky practice has been to say “Thank you, Daddy Saturn” every time getting stronger hurts a little bit, or becoming kinder requires unflattering humility, or leveling up requires hard work.

Discipline is a gift. Accountability is a gift. Patience is a gift.

Anyway, I’m doing much better. I’m reading Jung and doing my skincare and praying the rosary and getting sun on my face and sleeping nine hours: you know, hot girl shit. I also completely embraced writing to match my own freak, with total scandalous authenticity, which you can read about right here. And I’m so incredibly grateful that I was able to write the books that mean so much to me even during this rocky year, and to share them with all of you.

This is a very long-winded way of saying thank you for all your love and support. In true Scorpio fashion, the most tender gift I can give to you is a glimpse into the secret darkness of my innermost self.

The 9 Best Books of the Year

Anyway, enough navel gazing! You read the teaser, and you want those juicy, juicy recs! Without further ado, here are the best books that I read this year, in no particular order.

DO YOUR WORST by Rosie Danan: An uptight English archeologist desperate to restore his professional reputation and a fearless, curvy occultist determined to make a name for herself as a curse breaker butt heads in a crumbling Scottish castle. A sweet and sexy enemies-to-lovers contemporary with characters you’ll never forget (and a horny enchantment bent on getting our hero and heroine to hook up!), this was an instant classic for me.

THE SINS ON THEIR BONES by Laura Samotin: Now Laura is one of my nearest and dearest, and frequent co-conspirator, that said…this book eats. A queer found family fantasy rooted in Jewish mysticism and inspired by Eastern European history about a sad, deposed regent trying to seize his throne back from the husband who abused and deposed him? Run don’t walk.

THE UNIVERSAL CHRIST by Richard Rohr: As a progressive Catholic-leaning Christian deeply invested in nondualistic theology, it’s wild that I haven’t read this one before, but also how wonderful for it to have found me at this time in my life! It stirred me deeply, and gave me a lot to chew on. Most of all, it made me feel not alone. For anyone interested in how the life and teachings of Christ can transcend space, time, and religious divides to transform human experience, this is for you.

PRETENTIOUSNESS: WHY IT MATTERS by Dan Fox: An insightful cultural exploration of that age-old insult: “stop being so pretentious!”. I was stirred by the thoughts laid out in such wonderful prose, both ambitious and accessible, but when I reached the postscript where the author shifts from cultural analysis to personal essay about growing up with a family who helped him embrace his love of art? I got teary! Good writing has one responsibility, to move us, and this book succeeds.

HIS SECRET ILLUMINATIONS by Scarlett Gale: Listen to me. Fem!dom Vikingcore warrior woman and he msub! virgin monk healer go on a fantasy road trip to procure a magical book and heal from deep personal wounds along the way. If you like cozy fantasy, you will love this, and if you like your cozy with a side of horny, you will love it even more. If you are a romance reader who is a little skeptical about swashbuckling, commanding heroine falling for a hero whose skills lie in his cleverness and his kindness and how beautiful he is when he’s breathlessly eager to please, I need you to trust me on this. It’s one of the best romances I’ve ever read.

HOW TO WINTER by Kari Leibowitz: A must-read for anyone who struggles with seasonal affective disorder, or who wants to live more seasonally. A science-backed exploration of how mindset, preparation, and ritual can make winter more tolerable, even enjoyable, based on how folks in cold climates have lived for centuries.

SLOW PRODUCTIVITY by Cal Newport: I’ve read some of Newport’s other books, and I really appreciate his intentional, no-nonsense approach to productivity. This one helped me develop a sustainable practice of doing a couple things well instead of five things poorly, and of trying to maintain professional discipline while working with my body’s natural rhythms.

THE SIX DEATHS OF THE SAINT by Alix Harrow: Friends have been throwing this novelette (somehow weightier and more satisfying than many novels) at me for years and I’m so glad I finally read it. The less you know going in the better, but if you’ve ever wanted to watch a deathless battle saint wrestle with her own purpose in the scope of history, and in the eyes of the two men who shaped her, this is for you. Get the tissues!

UNDER THE PENDULUM SUN by Jeanette Ng: This is a creepy, tragic, lovely Gothic with a capital G which runs theological circles around any other book that has ever tried to measure the soul of a faery. Crimson Peak enjoyers, this is for you in more ways than one. A huge influence on SAVAGE BLOOMS. 6 stars.

Winter Wishes

That’s all I have for you this this year, dear reader! I’ll be sending out one more writing craft newsletter at the paid tier next week, about the best time of the year to query, so make sure to sub so you don’t miss out. You know the drill: tap on your settings, navigate to the subscriptions menu, click on this newsletter, and pick your price.

Wishing you well, and praying that love and magic always find you. Goodnight from Posie, and goodnight from me. See you in the new year <3

-S