refusing rapid release and choosing myself

burnout + grief + the future of the Summoner's Circle series

Standard publishing wisdom argues that faster is always better. From a commercial standpoint, readers of genre fiction always read faster than the author can write, so publishing as quickly as possible without sacrificing the quality of a book is key. Indie authors understand this intimately. They often have their whole series written and in the “bank” so they can release books weeks apart, or they perfect the art of writing extremely fast and extremely clean to get new books into the hands of readers ASAP.

I don’t work that fast and never have. If utterly left to my own devices I’ll conceptualize and write book for two years, take another year editing it with my publisher, and then publish and promote it with events and touring in year four. But I’m not left to my own devices. Writing is how I support myself as a single woman with no generational wealth and no partner to split bills with. It’s something I’ve pursued even while in school, even while holding down multiple jobs, because I desperately want to build a career with longevity, that can financially and creatively sustain itself on its own momentum.

I chase it because I believe in it, and because I believe in me. But I also chase it because I’m afraid.

I fear failure and obscurity. Letting down everyone who believed in me and being forgotten with an air of “she really fumbled all that opportunity”.

I’ve got that childhood scarcity trauma and that will to power and that dog in me. I don’t just want to do well, I want to be great. I don’t just want to make a little money, I want to be able to keep myself safe for life in a very real material way. And I want to do it all without sacrificing my artistic vision for these complicated, queer, messy, dark books.

In the first five years of my career I published a lot of books. Six, to be exact, if we include the revised and republished Odd Spirits. I was what we in the industry refer to as “doing doubles”: writing and publishing and promoting (often touring) two books a year. Even more unorthodox and more challenging, the books are in overlapping series in the same genre and age category, adult fantasy. Which means I’m hopping between publishers and between worlds as I work.

I knew from the jump this wasn’t sustainable. I made a deal with myself and everyone I loved during the DOWRY OF BLOOD GOLD rush that once a strong enough foundation of a career had been built, I would slow down. I had youth on my side, and hunger, and energy: I could burn the candle at both ends for a little while before I started to melt.

But with more success comes more pressure to succeed, and with each new contact signed that would pay my living expenses for a little while more, I locked in another year of high-speed, high-pressure work.

I thought I could handle this speed for one more year, even when my physical and mental health began to fray. But I knew I would hit a wall eventually.

Then, last spring, I called off my wedding four weeks before the ceremony, cancelled a planned international newlywed move, threw my life into a suitcase, and fled to New York City to recover in a friend’s generously lent apartment. I was plunged into a catastrophic grief, the kind that makes you unrecognizable to yourself and shakes your faith in love, and God, and human goodness.

Needless to say, I hit my wall.

I’ve talked more intimately about my relationship to work in my Saturn return podcast episode, but 2025 taught me how much I was using work to self-soothe and to patch up my broken self-esteem. It showed me, painfully, the lie I believed that I had to earn love through external achievements, that if I stopped achieving, something catastrophic would happen to me and the people I loved.

And I was tired, dude! Full on crying on the subway, disassociating in the Barnes and Noble, laying face down in my empty apartment tired. Thirty years of repressed anger coming to the surface, inner child meltdown, rapid cycling mania and depression tired.

Slowly, over time, and through the deep and freely-given and abiding love of my friends, I began to heal. I came back to myself, to my artistic joy and my spiritual practices and my compassionate care for my mind and body. I shed layers upon layers of snakeskin. I began to understand who I was when I wasn’t enmeshed in the person I had been with for the majority of my twenties.

Turns out, I like her! And it turns out that she had been screaming at me to slow down and get a life outside of work for years and I just wasn’t listening. Turns out, it’s not just just a matter of working hard and then playing hard in an endless cycle of achievement and performing celebration of achievements (David Aristarkhov I feel your spirit), but that to be truly well I’ve got to work hard, play hard, and rest hard in equal amounts, otherwise I collapse.

Which brings us to everybody’s favorite series about overachieving gay magicians pushing themselves to their breaking point: The Summoner’s Circle.

What’s Going On With DIVINATION?

The Summoner’s Circle series is taking a break after the paperback release of ASCENSION on May 5th. The Angry Robot team was so understanding of me needing a short hiatus to get my life in order, heal, and do the continued research and writing needed to make Moira’s book the best it can be.

DIVINATION will pick up a year and a half after the events of ASCENSION, with Moira opening her own metaphysical shop with the help of her men. A ghostly mystery forces her to cooperate with an irritatingly hot transmasc sleight of hand artist who can see the future - and happens to be Lorena Vargas’ nephew. He’s hot in a 90s Romeo + Juliet kind of way, and in true trickster fashion, you’ve already met him, in Leda’s club in ASCENSION.

DIVINATION will manifest spring 2028

(TANGLED ROOTS, the second book in my erotic folklore gothic Unearthly Delights Trilogy, is coming in 2027 but that’s all. I will not be doing doubles next year. We are choosing OURSELVES baby.)

In the meantime, the Angry Robot team and I have some treats for you to thank you for being so patient with me, and being the most magical fanbase in the world.

ASCENSION ARC PORTAL BACK OPEN

A limited number of physical and digital arcs of ASCENSION (Summoner’s Circle #2) will be available for request until April 26th.

Priority will be given to BIPOC and LGBTQ+ readers, booksellers, and librarians. We ask that if you already requested ASCENSION during the original arc open window last you, you do not request again to limit the strain on Angry Robot’s team. Good luck!

PRIDE PARTY BONUS CHAPTER

I know I put these damaged little gay people through emotional and spiritual horrors every single book, so the bonus chapter in the back of the ASCENSION paperback special is horny, low-angst fun. They deserve it, and so do you. Preorder you paperback to see what David, Rhys, and Moira get up to during the hiatus during Boston’s sweaty, sparkly June pride party.

Bisexual Moira truthers / autistic Rhys truthers / Antoni and David have probably hooked up at least once truthers, I see you. I am you. This chapter is for us.

The special edition is foiled with the sexiest candlelit sprayed edge, and he matches the EVOCATION B&N paperback special!

SPECIAL EDITION REMINDERS

If you are a hardcover enthusiast, there are still a few Waterstones signed special editions with foiled boards and a ribbon bookmark left over. Similarly, there are some standard US hardcovers left at Barnes and Noble, but they are about to be cleared out to make way for the paperbacks, so if you want hardcovers, you need to move on that expeditiously.

Let’s buy up these final hardcovers and show the bookstores that the readership for this series is still strong, and they should stay excited for DIVINATION!

For the paperback baddies, don’t forget to get your Barnes and Noble special with the pride chapter and the spredge! It’s the same price as the standard paperback which means - gay magician math - you’re basically saving money right?

Phew, big email, but it feels so good to get that all off my chest. I know you folks are here for the books, and I’m so glad for that, but I’ve always felt supported as a whole person by my audience, and I’m trying to treat myself as well as you and everyone in my personal life seems to think I deserve to be treated. It’s difficult, choosing peace and rest and play after a lifetime dedicated to chasing achievement whatever the cost, but I’m happy to be at this place on my own journey.

And between you and me, Divination is gonna be worth the wait 😉

If you’ve made it this far please make sure you’re signed up for my newsletter to get extra goodies and early announcements like this in your inbox.

That’s all I have for you this week, freaks and lovers. I hope you find a moment of gentle peace for yourselves today, and I hope you learn to choose yourself more with each passing year of your life.

-S